Is Kindness Worth It? Deep Debate at FriendZone
Summary
The FriendZone | Make Friends ⋅ Fun Chill Active Chat ⋅ VC Social Gaming ⋅ Memes ⋅ Nitro Emojis ⋅ Anime community recently engaged in a thought-provoking debate regarding the value of kindness. Members discussed whether kindness is a form of basic human decency or an inefficient use of personal energy. This discussion highlights the server's commitment to fostering meaningful social connections and deep conversations beyond typical gaming and meme sharing.
i mean being kind without expecting anything in return is stupid bc u r wasting ur energy for nothing. unless u get a emotion called joy which is a benfit
''unless u get a emotion called joy'' 😭
imo i think being kind is just having basic human decency towards other ppl.. i mean why wouldn't u want to be kind? and thats not saying that u should be rlly nice and let other ppl walk all over which is completely different. u can be respectful and kind towards ppl without losing anything which for example may be ur own self respect.
Agreed, being kidn is believing in humanity
No
Bc it will reward u
tryna look tuff hehhe. jokes aside unless u get something( joy,structure,favor)its rlly js useless
no, in reward u get joy
Kindness is optional, and you might not get anything in return, but it increases the chance, and can lead to relationships. Ive figured that out, and I utilize it because it feels right to me. If you dont want to be kind, thats you. Its basic human decency. Id even reccomend taking it further and continuing to be kind regardless of your relationship with the other person. It simply shows youre the better person.
Being nice and being kind are two different things, niceness is much more surface level and kindness is deep rooted
Whos to say you cant be both?
agreed
100% right
Ello!
True
Well ofc ppl can choose that but they're two different concepts used interchangeably
wassup
Agreed again
Not much of a reward and it doesn't always bring joy
Sure, but still. You can choose to be just "nice" to someone when you meet them to make a good impression, and when you get to know them, it can turn to genuine kindness.
The sky, why do you ask?
🤣 funny hahaa
Well being kind will still take much more effort
And its worth it.
Can depend
Being truly kind to someone is worth the effort tenfold, and can make both of your days, weeks, months, etc better.
Sure, theres no reason to be kind, but answer me this: Whats the reason not to?
Ig it depends on the person, like sometimes it feels like a waste to be kind to certain ppl unless they're a genuinely good person
I guess its a choice
People can appear rough while being kind, and even if that isnt the case, people can change. I did.
It very much is.
Some people prefer being real and straightforwad and some try to be nice
yup
cornball
Yeah
I wouldnt call it being "real", sometimes kindness is real.
Still not everyone does want to change, ofc that's more of an individual difference ig
Often times, even.
it depends on the situation tbh
And if they dont, thats them. Let them be them. Again, I ask. Whats the reason to be unkind?
u both are kind and real
Waste of energy on some people, not always tho
Thank you. Theres a subtle but real difference to appearing kind, and being kind.
Its important to know that distinction.
I agree
What energy are you wasting?
Wasting energy in order to be kind is the same as wasting energy to go to the gym. People use energy for anything, so usenit positively.
Idk like mental energy on those who don't acknowledge being at least decent to those who have been kind to them
That's physical Vs mental energy, different things
Sometimes some people feel like energy vampires
Mental energy is effort, and effort is important with everything. People use effort for everything, so again. Use it positively.
I agree
Exactly
I am very picky on who i need to give my eenrgy too
You still require mental energy to do physical tasks. Thats called motivation.
Ofc I'm not disagreeing since sometimes it's great to be kind, I just mean not to everyone
And to the people who you arent kind to, just be nice instead. As you said, less effort, but still positive. Cant do harm while being harmless.
Yh same, I've wasted a lot without getting just simple respect back so I only focus on those who r good
I see both of u have some past experiences and u both are right
And how do you know whos good?
Yh that works too
Several.
I know. Same for me. Thats y i am trying to find good people here
By how they act towards others, it can be kinda telling with some of them
So that brings up the choice of positivity and negativity. Whats the reason to choosing negativity?
Acting is differant than thoughts.
It's not a only one thing, different interactions with others can call for diff things
Yh so I agreeing being nice at first is fine
That lead down the same roads. Positivity and negativity. Its up to you to decide.
And if they respond with hate, dont hate back. Simply ignore them. Works every time.
Neutrality also works, distancing and maybe trying not to actively talk to whoever it is
Ah sometimes ig
Every time. The extent of ignorancy can be large, but ignorancy works.
Maybe with those which aren't close but it's harder with others
So take the effort.
It comes to a point when there's no energy left to keep making an effort on others
Thats called depression by opresssion. Ive been in that situation not long ago, and the solution is one youve already brought up. Neutrality. Dont go actively looking for relationships by being kind, just let the good ones come to you every so often.
Yeah good idea ngl
It worked for me. Take the chance if you feel that way. I hope it helps.
Yh thx for the idea
Of course!
Yup
U should try eft it helps in breaking a pattern in life
I do it allot
Being kind will make you liked.
We humans have an instinctual and biological imperative to be liked, as we are social animals.
All truly strong people are kind!!!- Vagabond
Deja vu... Did you read Zariel’s “women unalived chivalry” thread and post your opinion as a new thread instead of posting within it?
My opinion is still the same: if you think good deeds are transactional, you’re manipulative and not genuine. I hope people keep taking from you until you eventually think, 'Why do I attract gold diggers?' Remember this post and check yourself
Man!! Tough, being kind and putting a saintly persona just so you want to be liked- pathetic way to live I'd say!!
Only those are truly kind who do not expect anything in return.
They just help and move on- freaking legends!!
yea thats our human nature and what our brain wants, and evryone including me does thta, but i dont think its transactional ,our subconcious js likes that feeling(reward) so it does it agin and again. we dont expect anything we just get it kinda
Yeah man exactly!!
You just help someone and instantly feel great lol!!
I love it
which is a reward lol
Yeah haha
dap?
??
A birthday gift for your partner because you want them to feel loved and seeing them happy makes you happy ≠ transaction
Opening a door for a stranger because you simply want to be kind and it makes you feel good ≠ transaction
A birthday gift for your partner in expectation of a “special” favor in return = transaction
Opening a door for a stranger in expectation of a conversation = a transaction.
As long as you and your partner are transparent about the transactional exchanges, all is good. Other than that, I condemn emotional ruses 😭
It's a human feeling
No good deed goes unpunished
You must be a sociopath because this is how they think
lol
