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Accepting FRs and Talking to Strangers

The hub is regularly asked why we have a DM/FR policy that doesn’t allow for open DMs and similar, and so because we have seen an uptick of abuse in private spaces, we would like to take this time to remind everyone about internet safety.

Most of us here are good people, here for fun, community, building relationships. Unfortunately, some of us are not. And even more unfortunately, you don’t have a way of knowing who is who.

You are adults; we cannot control you, Infact we respect your freedom. But freedom is strongest when it walks hand-in-hand with wisdom. And wisdom asks questions.
we are urging you all to please not accept DMs and FRs from strangers (people you haven’t spent time getting to know more publicly in a server) - not because of our rules, but for your safety, and not just from our server, but others where maybe you have open DMs, or maybe you share no server and they just “found” you.

We know it sounds like fun. We know some of you like the excitement of getting into DMs with anyone, especially anyone who sends you a random kinky thought. But think of this: are you on an even playing field?

What if you don’t know that person, but they know you. What if that’s not their main account. Maybe they’ve been piecing together your every photo. Maybe they’ve been watching every single thing you’ve been saying for weeks, months, years on another account and compiling it into all the information they need to quickly pretend to be just who they need to be to fool and manipulate you specifically. Maybe they’re someone you already dislike choosing to try again under a new guise of anonymity.

When you accept DMs and FRs from strangers, you’re allowing someone you don’t know private access to you. Dangerous access. And just because you don’t know them, does not mean they don’t know you.

We are urging you all to be careful and scrupulous when giving access to yourself, even when it seems fun to do otherwise. Have fun, but be safe first.

And yes, Doms, we mean you too. Doms are not exempt from instances we know of people creating accounts to hide and manipulate armed with knowledge gathered elsewhere while pretending to be someone new who miraculously fits so well.

Thank you