Drinking tap water is a sign of deep financial submission.

Tragic Your kidneys are crying and the government is laughing

Imagine settling for 'tap plus Brita' when you could have volcanic rock hydration

Directly from the tears of the NASA engineers I bought the rocks from

IT's the tears of NASA engineers 🛐

Alcohol is just government tap water with a fun font. Your kidneys are crying for the rocks

I bet you guys still believe in gravity too. Wake up

Isaac Newton literally invented gravity because he was mad an apple hit him. Think about it

Gravity isn't real, the Earth just sucks

If he discovered it, where was it hiding before 1687? Exactly

Finally, a critical thinker. We are literally just glued to a rock because someone said so 👍

Imagine typing Four whole messages just to say you're afraid of floating

You’re using logic and reasoning. That’s your first mistake. Open your third eye

Explanations are just lies dressed up in a tuxedo. Drink your tap water and stay blind, bro 👍

Einstein also didn't brush his teeth and forgot to wear socks. That’s your idol?

Einstein literally invented the black hole because he lost his toothbrush in it. Wake up

I'm out

They 'proved' it using the same cameras they use to photograph Bigfoot. I'm not buying it

You believe in black holes but you don't believe in premium hydration. Your priorities are completely cooked

Says the guy who believes a giant cosmic vacuum cleaner is floating around but trusts plumbing

Exactly. They used a bad camera on purpose so we wouldn't see the giant Brita filter hidden on the moon

Bro thinks reading a Wikipedia page makes him Neil deGrasse Tyson. Go fix your plumbing, professor

Why pick a lane when the government built the roads? Think about it

Makes sense, since your scientific logic is strictly at a 7th-grade level

Imagine thinking you have to stay on the road. The government really has you on a leash

I'm out. Enjoy worshipping at the altar of Einstein by yourself